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Hello my friends!
Welcome to a new video and my first Giveaway! I’m so excited and so nervous in the same time.
2 of you will win multiple prizes, and I WILL tell you in just a moment what the prizes are, how you can enter to win and how to get bonus entries.
Today’s video is part of the Personal Growth playlist and it’s about giving you some quality tips that help increase self-esteem.
For many of us, things that happened in our lives, stripped us of some of that confidence. You know I’ve talked very openly about some of my own personal struggles and I’m always the first one to admit that years ago I was one of the most insecure people… I’ve ever known.
But confidence can be learned and confidence can be practiced. And with the practice of doing things that are designed to re-train our minds and boost that self esteem, the real thing will happen. And that’s what happened with me. I took the same approaches I’m sharing with you.
Just so you know, the reason I focus so much on content, is because when I was in that process of wanting to learn how to accept myself, become more confident, I kept running into advice that just… wasn’t enough, you know? I would hear people say that I should love myself, but how do I do that? After I’ve resented myself, talked down and doubted myself for so many years, how do I do that?
So my videos aren’t long because I enjoy spending 8 hours editing, it’s because I want to give you that value. I want to give you those practical tips, and er need more than 2 minutes to give that kind of value. So I want us to apply method to our lives, from our own self growth, to our relationships and career, you know, the stuff I talk about in my videos. But I believe that through order, through clear direction and plans of action, we can absolutely overcome just about everything and anything that’s holding us back.
In the case of self-confidence, I’ve made 3 videos already, super packed with tips that you could start right now, that will help boost your confidence. I already talked in detail about grooming, posture, changing the way you talk, and shared examples. In the email I sent exclusively to my web subbies, I also went into the mood-boosting diet, exercise, how to play on your strengths and wear the right clothes, etc. etc. There are over 40 tips.
And so I’m not redundant, I won’t go over those again, but if you haven’t seen or heard them yet, and you are interested to see what’s out there, the videos are linked below, and if you sign up for the newsletter right now, I’ll email you the additional private content as well. All the links are in the video description for you.
Now let’s add some new ideas that will help boost your self esteem.
Here’s what! Affirmations and positive thinking are great and they are part of the process but I want to be perfectly clear you guys. Significant progress comes from doing certain things too, not just kicking back and thinking and wishing to feel better.
So this week, I’d like for you to take action in the form of identifying your talents. Every person is good at something. There’s no such thing as being bad at everything. That’s bull! What you need to do, is figure out your something. So ask yourself questions like: “What am I good at?” “What can I do?” “What was I able to do in the past?” “What’s something I’ve done that was good?”
Believe it or not, I’m really good at cleaning my house. I keep that shit tight! I don’t like doing it, but I’m really good at it. I’m also good at cooking. I have a sense of adding spices based on how they smell and how that smell makes me feel. It’s weird I know, but it’s my thing. And even though I sometimes stress because I work so much it’s hard to find the time to cook and clean like I want, when I make myself make the time, after I do it, I have a sense of pride and accomplishment, that I did something really well. That’s the feeling I want you to go after.
I talked in detail before about doing that “something” that you love, something that makes you happy. Now we’re adding something – that you’re good at. No matter what it is – Cast any judgment aside and allow yourself to take pride in whatever that talent may be. Writing, painting, singing, crafts, cleaning… focus on your talent every week and express yourself through it.
And if you have a talent that can be developed, do it. Read books, take some classes. This way you’ll start developing a sense of accomplishment and pride in yourself. And that’s part of the re-wiring.
Next tip is to speak slowly. Remember when I talked about posture? Well here we are again, with something else that’s simple, but that make a really big difference. You may have noticed that people in positions of power, people with authority in general, don’t speak a million miles per hour – like I am in these videos, because I’m trying to pack a lot of content in them.
Now I’m not saying to to ta-lk li-ke th-is, just don’t be blah blah all the time. A person with confidence speaks like this. I speak a little slower, because I’m selective with what I’m saying. I’m giving myself the proper time to make sure that what comes out of my mouth is not only thought out and educated but worthy of listening.
This is something simple, but trust me it’s not easy. And if you’re a fast talker, expect that it WILL take practice, so please don’t give yourself a hard time. Try doing this every day. Don’t stop trying. And without realizing, you will re-train yourself into a new way of speaking. People around you will be more captivated, your self-esteem will rise. Only good will come.
In addition to speaking slowly and standing straight and smiling, which I talked about in the past, it will be great for you to always make eye contact as well. When you make eye contact as you’re talking to people, you’ll bring about a sense of self-value, because what you’re essentially showing, is that you’re confident with what you’re saying, and that goes a long way in boosting your self-confidence. Even if you’re not confident with what you’re saying, why give into that? Fake it till you make it right? Same concept applies. Why cave into those feelings of insecurity? Now I’m not saying to be like this, because that’s just weird, but I am suggesting you look into people’s eyes like this. You can occasionally break the contact, just don’t make it often and don’t make it a habit.
I’d like for you to do this exercise with me:
Imagine yourself as a kabob. I know that sounds silly, but hear me out – your shoulders are pulled back and your back is straight and strong like the long skewer. Look at yourself in the mirror till you figure out where your back is straight. So the back is solid like the piece of wood. Now the meat, the meat just hangs on the skewer right? It doesn’t pose any resistance. So your meat should also hang and be relaxed. With that back straight, bring your chin up to where it’s parallel to the floor. Now close your eyes, relax your forehead, relax your jaw, and relax your arms. Stay in this position for a few deep breaths. Now open your eyes, smile and go about your day. You can do this 30 second exercise sitting down or standing. But tell me that your demeanor doesn’t feel different!
Now take this posture and look at people in their eyes, and you’ll feel your confidence rising.
If you don’t like calling it the kabob exercise, name it whatever you want, but just do it every day.
Next tip is to not get discouraged or demotivated when something’s not working. Especially if that’s something you’ve already started, and you’re like halfway through with it.
I can give you a perfect example. Me. I put a lot of work in these videos. There’s a very complex writing process in place, because content is my asset. I work for this video and blog series, 10 to 13 hours a day and week ends. And because I put so much into it and I’m very emotionally invested in it, there are many moments when I get discouraged. If somebody leaves a weird comment or when I get no subscribers the whole day that affects the confidence I have in this project and the confidence I have in myself, because I start wondering if I’m good enough, if this content is good enough, and so forth.
Giving up would be the easiest thing to do. But then if I give up, I would never know if something could have happened. The dream, the wants and would likes, everything would be gone. And what would really happen to my confidence after that?
You see… everybody has insecurities, everyone’s facing their own challenges and their own demons, everyone has fears, but what really matters is how we deal with all that. And giving up especially after having been involved in something, is not the right thing to do. So whatever you may have going on now, don’t give up. Take a little break to clear your head, but come back and do what you wanted to do. That extra mile, that’s when the magic happens, so don’t give up!
I needed to keep this relatively short to factor in the giveaway time, so all the other tips attached with today’s video are available in email format. Please sign up on AlexandraPotora.com, it’s free and you’ll get a bunch of good content that was written for you, with a bunch of love, and desire to help and make a difference in your life.
Next week in the Relationships & Sex video we’re going to talk about How to Be His Queen. You know.. Doing little things that show thoughtfulness and affection and capture his heart! But till then, I think we gotta have ourselves a giveaway, right?
GIVEAWAY TIME!!!
Alright – for the next 2 weeks you can enter to win. The giveaway is international, so no matter where you are in the world, you can enter to win.
I have 2 prizes. One is a YouTube prize, the other is an Instagram prize. You can enter both. I was thinking about what to give away, and I decided to go with things that I love, things that I’ve used or that I really want. Either way, there are things that have meaning to me, that I believe in, and not just stuff.
Please watch video for showcase of prizes and how to enter to win.
